


Poptart And Grif

by MnyehLike (SilverDreemurr)



Series: Cursed RvB Food Fiction [1]
Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Background Grimmons, Food Sex, Other, Snacks & Snack Food, remember wash's pumpkin?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-29
Updated: 2020-04-29
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:01:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23915005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverDreemurr/pseuds/MnyehLike
Summary: I am so fucking sorry. Grif fucks a box of poptarts that's it that's the fic
Relationships: Dexter Grif/Dick Simmons, Dexter Grif/Poptart Box
Series: Cursed RvB Food Fiction [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1734709
Comments: 12
Kudos: 19





	Poptart And Grif

Grif looked around the room. Nobody was around. Nobody usually was at midnight. Good. He gets up on his tiptoes and grabs the box of Poptarts off the top shelf. Simmons had put it up there earlier in the hopes that it would stop Grif from eating them. Of course, not only could Grif reach them, but he wasn’t eating them.

He opened the box carefully, not wanting to wake anyone up. This was about the only thing he would be slightly embarrassed about, ever. He then grabs a knife to surgically remove the Poptarts from the silver foil. Jesus, he was acting like Simmons. But, would he rather act like a nerd, or get caught by someone? Sarge was the most likely to come. He didn’t wanna get caught with his dick in a box of Poptarts by  _ Sarge _ of all people.

Once he’s done getting the Poptarts out, he puts them back in the box and goes into the fridge to grab some milk. He needed some lube after all. He pours the milk into the box, then pulls down his sweatpants. He strokes his cock once or twice to get it up, then he stuffs his dick into the box alongside the Poptarts.

Mmm, crumbly and wet. Just how he liked it. He groans softly and lets his eyes slide closed. The first plunge was always the best in his opinion. He opens his eyes again and looks around to make sure nobody’s there. He then goes back into the snack cabinet and grabs...Oh, oh wonderful. The first thing he grabbed? Simmons’ Zebra Cakes. He always bitched when Grif ate these. He opened the box and grabbed a couple of packs out, then unwrapped them and stuffed them into his mouth to muffle his moans.

He then starts moving. Slowly at first, but then a bit faster. A bit faster became a lot faster, and then he couldn’t stop, not even if Sarge or Donut or Lopez walked in, he was fucking the box of Poptarts and nobody could stop him. He tipped his head back and groaned loudly, he was so fucking close. He was missing something, though. What was it, what was it…?

The door slid open, and the light clicked on. “Mmh…? Wh-Grif??” Grif looked over, and there was Simmons, in the doorway. He must have just woken up for a glass of water or something, he still looked half asleep. His hair was all messed up, and his glasses were crooked, and he was wearing those stupid Star Wars pyjamas again, and by god, it was exactly what Grif needed.

He bit his lip and tried to groan quietly, but he was cumming, so he didn’t have the strength to keep  _ that  _ quiet. Simmons was definitely 100% awake now, and he was as red as his armour, staring wide-eyed at the situation in front of him. He decided to get that glass of water later, turning around and just walking away.

Grif sighs softly. That would be a bitch to explain tomorrow...


End file.
